Ayamelicious
by Fufuluff
Summary: Akito has died... what will the Sohma family do once Ayame insists on taking charge? HUGE CRACKFIC. Rated T, for Kyo's mouth.
1. Chapter 1

Name: Ayamelicious.

Chapter: One, "Sexylicious."

Relationships; As of now, all of them, except friendship. Hiro and Kisa's puppy love is mentioned, a little.

Author's Notes: HAH! MY FIRST EVER FANFICTION. I hoped it was RENT, but my friend has me hooked on Fruit Basket. I'm a total and complete loon for it, and I've been going insane lately. Ayame is one of my fave charries, and I thought it would be very interesting if he became leader. Yes, a bit cloche, with the death and all- but it's a crackfic, deal with it, alright? XDD Alright then, GET TO READING.

Sexylicious.

Oh my goodness! Only a name such as: Sexylicious, could be stormed up by the greatest of them all!

Oh but tut tut, I understand-- I'm flattering myself.

I looked into the mirror, holding a delectable fur coat- made of only the finest fake fur.

How horrible would it be to hurt innocent creatures?

"Mirror mirror, on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?"

I focused on the mirror and let out a monotone voice, "Youuu aree."

I squealed happily, "I should do more improv!" I chuckled to myself, and isn't this purple font just amazing?

"DAMN, AYAME." Kyo snarled from downstairs, "Bastard, stop narrating yourself."

"Oh, I'm so offended." Ayame crumpled into Kyo's arms; fake sobs emitting from his mouth.

Kyo's heart stopped as Ayame's hand touched his chest.

"Why, Kyo! You've certainly been pumping up lately."

"..."

"You'd fabulous in this outfi-" Ayame laughed giddily.

"...YUKI! DAMNIT! GET YOUR CREEP ASS BROTHER AWAY FROM ME!" Kyo slapped Ayame's hand away from him, muttering curse words under his breath.

Enter Yuki Sohma, silvery purple hair wavering in such elegance, he rolled his eyes.

"Aaya."

"Could it be? My fabous-an-ta-bu-lus brother calling to me? Oh, I can hear the BELLLS!"

"I hate that song. -. -" Yuki snapped, looking at his brother an annoyed face. "Stop brothering people." He said, monotone.

"Your wish is my command- BROTHER!" Aaya tackle glomped Yuki.

It had all seemed like a normal morning.

Tohru making breakfast, Kyo sulking on the roof, Aaya and Shigure flirting harmlessly with each other- or so it looked, and Yuki... well, being Yuki. Until...

Hatori unlocked the door, walking in with the most monotone look on his face. His bangs swept across his face, keeping that same expression.

"Shigure, Aaya." He prompted, the two giggling boys followed.

"Come with me, Shigure!" Aaya crooned.

"I'm coming, my dear-"

"Will you two sit down, I have serious matters to tell you." He groaned, clearly troubled, confused, annoyed, and happy all at the same time.

Shigure raised an eyebrow, "I suppose." He sighed, taking a seat.

Aaya immediately took a seat down, considering Hatori told him to.

"Akito is ill."

Both boys look at him with blank expressions. "...So?" They both said.

"It's fatal." Hatori nodded matter-o-factly. He knew, somehow, nobody would be _truly_ bothered by this.

Aaya sat there, hands folded over the table. In the straightest face he muster, he said in a very convincing serious tone.

"How many days 'till he dies?" Then he winked.

Hatori rolled his eyes.

Shigure chuckled seductively at Aaya.

Within few days, matters had sprung all around the Sohma family. And within a month... Akito, the great god Akito died.

Much to everyone's surprise, they had never thought someone that powerful could just go. But then again-- a inquired immune deficiency Syndrome, had been diagnosed... Just kidding! His death was of mystery.

------;

Ayame, tempted to have a rice ball play the role of the priest in Akito's funeral, had had the offer turned down by Hatori.

Hatori made all of the Sohmas pay respect.

Although... Hatori didn't really support Akito's ways.

"YA DAMN RAT, YOU GONNA KEEP ON SAYING THOSE JOKES?"

"Oh, you stupid cat. This is a funeral. I wasn't making jokes." Yuki rolled his eyes.

"YEAH YOU WERE. C'MON, LET'S FIGHT. AKITO'S-"

"Deee-aad!" Shigure sang to the two boys, popping in randomly.

Yuki and Kyo both gave off an aggravated sigh.

"How, joy to the world. After all, I paid Akito respects just so he won't haunt me in the aftermath!" Shigure babbled in his annoying bubbly voice.

Kyo clenched his fists, bumping into Tohru.

"I-i-i-it's so sad! He just... died!" She whimpered.

Kyo's fists clenched even harder, "Damnit, get over it. If you haven't noticed, you're the only one who cares!" He spat, stalking away from the ditzy girl.

"Kyo, that is no way to treat Miss Honda." Yuki's scolding voice entered the cat's ears.

"OH YEAH? YOU WANNA BET? I CA TREAT HER HOWEVER I WANNA TREAT HER, YA DAMN RAT!"

"Stupid cat." He muttered to Tohru, who just smiled nervously.

----;

"We all gather here today." Ayame began, looking at all the faces turned to him. Yes, he had the spotlight. He flaunted whatever her head.

Today the guy had chosen a slight pink-tinted outfit, although Hatori made him wear black. Ayame had insisted on dying it slightly pink. Therefore, it only looked magenta in the daylight. Lucky for him- today was sunny.

"To..."

"Celebrate." Hiro muttered under his breath to Kisa, who giggled.

"Akito's death." Ayame didn't bother correcting the young lamb- he was right. He doubted anyone wanted to mourn the death anyway.

And it went on like that, for a while.

"And then there was this time, I expressed my feelings in a dress. And he rewarded me with a slap, across the face."

Shigure wiped a tear.

"OH! AAYA~~! You poor soul! Come over here, and give a hug! Let my warmth comfort you!"  
"Oh Shigure, it's been waiting so long!" Aaya ran over to Shigure and two hugged.

"Yeahyeah!"

Hatori rolled his eyes, "Back to your speech, Ayame." He prompted.

"OH YES! ANYWAY!"

Kyo gave out an aggravated sigh, "Get on with it, damnit."

"For once, I agree with you." Yuki said lifelessly, tapping his fingers on the table impatiently.

Tohru's legs swung back and forth under the table.

"Go on, Aaya! Go on! Go on!"

"Thank you, Miss Honda." Aaya winked, his voice cockier than ever.

"As I was going to say, I spoke over this with Shigure, and- since no one wants too- and no one asked- I'll do the great honours of taking over

as leader!"

"WHAT!?" Yuki and Kyo snarled, Kyo breaking the glass he was drinking out of in rage.

"Oh, Kyo, I know your THRILLED! But contain that excitement, inside next time." Aaya winked; there was no stopping him now.

"DAMNIT, YOU'RE SO GODDAMN ANNOYING!"

"Yay! Ayame, I'm very excited to see change around here!" Tohru replied that goofy grin on her face. She began to clap.

Oddly enough, others did too- maybe things would change with Ayame.

But who said for the better?

----;

Notes:

Wow, now that THAT'S OVER AND DONE. We can get to the real deal!

No more Akito! I'm sorry all you Akito-fans…

Er… fans

Hehe. ^^ I'm sure he'll make an appearance somehow.

I have NO idea how many chapters this will have- it kinda depends on the reviews, and if I itch to write. I hoped you enjoyed!

OH! Also, READ THIS NOW:

I watched the Anime series, I have NOT started the manga. Don't flame me, I assure you, this crack series will still be funny.

My friend has read the manga, and I have the basic jist of all the characters in it, etc etc. But I don't feel confident enough as to writing with them, I hope that doesn't bother y'all too much. –Don't stop reading. xD-

Anyway! REVIEW! REVIEW! Thankies!


	2. A Note:

_**Author's Notes: I will probably not continue this anymore. Although, not a loss for most people. It was as successful as I thought it would be. :3 Perhaps if I get enough reviews saying to continue, I will. But for now, this story is over. **_

_**I need to focus more on Kyo's FMLS, and other things I have planned. As well as life. Ahahha!**_

_**Anyway, **_

_**---Lexi.**_


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